WWE WrestleMania 41 results (Night 1) and commentary from Danny Damage!

Previously On…

As is the norm with Wholey Whorey Entertainment today, we can’t even watch the wrestlers arrive at the arena without being hounded with adverts/other people’s branding.

It wasn’t just these nameplates, but the third-party-branded/named arena itself had a few companies splattered over the walls too, which could be seen as the wrestlers wandered around.

Another awful (but OMG it’s shiny/well-produced!!!!) 4th-wall-breaking cold open:
– If “WWE is everywhere”, why does anyone need to gather around the events?
– If you give a fake belt to everyone remotely famous, why are the real ones worth a shit?
– Trips, Rock, management are high as fuck on their own farts; almost as cringe as Tony Khan.

Another terrible choice in theme music…but at least some record label greased Triple H’s palm, am I right? What happened to rock/metal-esque, arse-kicky music that fits a show about fighting? Recent musical choices just make WWE come off as “reality” TV slop.

Yes, I’m sure record sales, social marketing followers, the cost of the production equipment used, and the “drawing power” of modern talk shows look promising to executives on paper, but all of these things are supposed to enhance the product in practice, yet they TAKE FROM it.

For more warm-up/pre-view commentary on the Showcase of the Commercials, please enjoy this pre-AdvertMania 41 edition of The Dr.Huge Show…

WWE WrestleMania 41 Results (Night 1)

Not even ten minutes in aaaaand, that’s me out; I’m not wasting any more hours of my life on this shameless shite.

No, this isn’t a bit.

I turned off the “show” for an hour and then came back to it, skipping ahead to the Punk/Reigns/Rollins triple threat match. I’m probably only going to watch the main event of night 2 as well.

I’m still going to post the results here, for what it’s worth, but we’d had around 20 different products/brands/things that weren’t wrestling rammed down our throats between the end of the kick-off show and BEFORE The Rock’s Lesser Cousin Jey Uso got into the ring. I didn’t want to see any more, as I was pretty sure I knew where this match was going…and I was right.

After Triple H left the ring and declared the action was about to commence, we saw:
-Jey Uso’s theme “performed” by a “musician” advertising his record label/hairdresser/clothing company.
-That same performer’s sound equipment had a video game advert/poster on it.
-The same fake-musician had a custom championship belt that he held up proudly as if he’d earned it.
-Cheerleaders from the local sports team (I’ll guess football) were shown in the crowd/dancing Uso to the ring.
-Slim Jim got a big mention as some competition winners with front-row seats were tactlessly pointed out by Michael Cole while Goofy Uso continued to hotdog his way to the ring.
-The custom WrestleMania 41 stage was designed with space for multiple mentions of a sponsor…neat.
-At one point, I counted TWELVE different logos/brands/names/things that weren’t the thing (wrestling) we’d paid and sat down to watch. It was eleven for the majority of the night, but Logan Paul’s piss-water bottle got kicked into the overhead shot during the last match.

Play along at home and see if you can count ’em all!

If management aren’t going to take this shit seriously, neither am I.

Honestly, Vince McMahon had many problems with himself and with his presentation of pro-wrestling, but this is dire.

Opening Contest Jey Uso vs. Gunther (World Title)

Winner: Opening Contest Jey Uso (pinfall)

Yes, that’s right, we’ve gone two years in a row now where Gunther has put over some shlub.

Obviously, Jey needed to win for himself and to continue proving the importance of a Royal Rumble win. I’d be surprised if he had a long title run. WWE forcing this only needs to pin “former World Champion” on this merch machine. People will buy his “Main Event” flavoured merch, while he’s literally “Opening Contest” Jey Uso.

You can give me the business about “But look how involved the crowd are when Uso’s music hits” (and they get to sing/dance along and make it about themselves!), but fans are fickle and as Cody Rhodes’ popularity reflects, even the sing-a-long favourites can become old news fast.

Sadly, Gunther also needed to win this. I’m so glad Vince isn’t around to ruin his aura/reputation with a silly name/gimmick/presentation. </sarcasm>

The New Day vs. The Viking Raiders (World Tag Titles)

Winners: New Day (pinfall)

Jade Cargill vs Naomi

Winner: Jade Cargill (pinfall)

Jacob Fatu vs. LA Knight (US Title)

Winner: Jacob Fatu (pinfall)

Despite being over as hell and selling loads of merch (the apparent criteria some talent meet before they’re given the “main event treatment”), a secondary title like the US Championship seems to be LA Knight’s peak. Maybe he should consider getting more famous family members the next time he starts working in an industry.

Unless there was going to be a DQ/shenanigans/etc., Fatu was always winning this.

Chad Gable vs. Rey Fenix (originally Rey Mysterio)

Winner: Chad Gable (pinfall)

Rey Mysterio was “injured” beforehand, so Gable had to fight the budget/AEW knockoff Mysterio instead.

Aren’t we lucky that Vince McMahon isn’t around to make a mockery of legit (and once-super over) talent like Chad Gable? </sarcasm>

Charlotte Flair vs. Tiffany Stratton (WWE Women’s Title)

Winner: Tiffany Stratton (pinfall)

Tiff needed to win this. Charlotte’s reputation isn’t damaged by this loss. WWE astrofturfed her aggressively in her early days, she has loads of time to be the first woman to beat her dad’s record.

By then, Charlotte will probably have had another new face or two that WWE can advertise. Eww.

CM Punk vs. Seth Rollins vs. Roman Reigns (Paul Heyman on a Pole Match)

Winner: Seth Rollins (pinfall)

Heyman turned on Punk to help Reigns and then turned on Reigns to align with Rollins. Rather predictable, as a Heyman/Rollins pairing was the only new ground available, despite them both being over-exposed individually.

And Another Thing…

CM Punk…c’mon, man. I’ve been a huge advocate of you getting your WrestleMania main event spot…but this wasn’t the main event.

Last year, I stated how you have way more star power than Cody Rhodes and that I’d have nudged him and his story aside for your return to the company and your chance at the main event/main title.

This wasn’t what you’ve bitched about for years. This wasn’t what you deserved. This was the final match on the warm-up show of WrestleMania, the opening night, the supporting card, but it was not the main event.

Sorry.

–  OLDER RESULTS –

• WWE Elimination Chamber 2025
• WWE Royal Rumble 2025
• WWE Raw Debuts on Netflix (Jan 6th 2025)
• WWE Survivor Series 2024

Thanks for reading these WWE WrestleMania 41 Night 1 results! Feel free to comment below, get in touch on X/Twitter, catch me on The Dr Huge Show (Tuesdays & Saturdays), show me some love on Ko-fi, SUBSCRIBE to my YouTube channel and/or share this with your wrestling friends and family.